Posts Tagged ‘worse taste’

What Not To Wear

Monday, September 21st, 2009

A few days ago, one of the trending topics on Twitter was What Not to Wear. Now, you know I have advice on this for days, so I went a little crazy with it. I thought I’d compile a few of the most popular ones I tweeted as a sort of guideline, if you will, to steer you in the direction of good taste. (Of course, the very fact that you are reading this blog, automatically means you have good taste, but should you have friends with no taste, feel free to pass this along).

- Cowboy boots, cowboy hats, basically anything cowboy themed, unless you are out legitimately rounding up cattle for a living.

- Sunglasses in a nightclub. Why not just literally stick your head up your ass instead?

- Denim mini skirts with leggings. Could you be more of a cliche?

- Pigtails. If you’re over the age of 8 and not a German milkmaid, it’s just unacceptable.

- Low rise jeans with a thong underneath. As soon as you sit down we get your whale tail in HD and it’s not appreciated.

- Chipped nail polish. If you have time to put it on, you have time to take it off.

- Jeans with no back pockets. The fabric doesn’t fool me homie, you’re basically trying to rock leggings and we all know that’s out.

- Anything from Lady Gaga’s wardrobe.

- Anything made by Beyonce’s mama.

- Low cut tops if your boobs are down to your knees. That’s not cleavage, it’s an abyss.

- White girl weave. This white girls with weave phenomenon has to end some time. I vote for right now.

- 17,000 necklaces at the same time. Only Mr T can pull that shit off.

Now of course, the old standards of no Crocs, Ugg boots or flip flops still apply – I just figured you would be more than familiar with my hatred of that particular trifecta of footwear hell.

Now go forth and be fashionable!

Tags: , ,
Posted in fashion | 4 Comments »