Posts Tagged ‘low self esteem having fools’

Let It Go Already!

Tuesday, July 28th, 2009

 

We women like to feed each other some bullshit at times. Especially when it comes to men. During my recent break up, my girl friends rallied around me and dropped nuggets like; ‘He’s scared of his feelings for you,’ ‘He’s intimidated by you,’ ‘Give it time, he’ll be back.’ Ladies, respectfully, I ask you, what kind of horse shit is that? 

 

You know why my fella broke up with me? Because he didn’t want to be with me. Did I need him to say it twice? No. Did I call him and beg him to work it out? No. Am I sitting around strategizing ways to get him back? No. Why? Because I happen to think I am entirely too awesome to waste my time chasing after someone who has explicitly said they don’t want to be with me. 

 

So, for those ladies who need to hear it, don’t fear, I’m here to give you a no nonsense guide to breaking up and keeping your dignity in tact. 

 

If a man tells you/shows you he doesn’t want you, he has the right to do that. You don’t need to know the reasons why. Just hear he isn’t into you. Logic has to overcome your emotions at some point. Why would you want someone who doesn’t want you? It just doesn’t make any sense. 

 

Men, you’ve got to be forthright in what you’re saying. Just be honest and say you don’t want to be with her. If you drop the ‘I don’t see long term potential in this’ or ‘I can’t see  myself marrying you’ some women take that as a challenge, dig their heels in and set about trying to change your mind. That one sentence just bought you anywhere between 6 months and 4 years trying to get out of an already bad situation. Good luck! 

 

Ladies, just because you elected to ignore the fact that he said he doesn’t want to be with you, doesn’t make it any less true. Don’t take the fact that he is still willing to sleep with you to mean that he still wants to be with you. He does not. He is merely a red blooded male and if you lay it out on a platter, he will chow down. He is sleeping with you for three reasons a) because you let him b) to avoid having to deal with your crazed phone calls/emails/text messages and c) for something to do until someone better comes along. 

 

On that note, once you are just sleeping together, please don’t try to keep up the pretense that you are in a ‘relationship.’ There is no relationship at this point. You are fuck buddies. 

 

Where is your dignity God damnit?! Bottom line, you’re just embarrassing yourself for someone who doesn’t want you. Isn’t it just a tad cringeworthy to have to ‘prove’ to someone that you are worth it? You may think he is perfect for you and you’d make a great couple, but I’m pretty sure, by definition, the perfect partner is someone who actually wants you. 

 

Just my humble opinion, of course.

Tags: , ,
Posted in relationships | 9 Comments »