Tuesday, July 27th, 2010
Through various debates I’ve seen online recently (some I’ve been guilty of starting), one theme seems to have been prevalent: judgement. Apparently, we shouldn’t do it. Judging is bad, terrible, awful, you’re an awful person if you judge others (which in itself is a bit of a judgement, but whatever), you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, yada yada yada. That’s all great, but can we have a reality check for a second? We all do it!
Let’s all get off our collective high horses and just admit, we all judge other people. There, doesn’t that feel good to just let that out? Please don’t even for a second think about getting up in this comments section talking about how you genuinely don’t judge people because that is the biggest load of bollocks you will have ever typed. Don’t do it. Enough with all that holier-than-thou bullshit, seriously.
It doesn’t even matter if it’s right or wrong that we judge people, the fact of the matter is we do it. We ALL do it. When you go for a job interview, you don’t roll up in there in your jim jams and a pair of flips flops, do you? Of course not, because you know you’re being judged and you know it’s important that you make a good impression. (Quick side note: if any of you have ever gone to an interview wearing flip flops, see me in my office after – I have a bitch slap with your name all over it.)
I judge people all the time, by what they’re wearing, how they’re acting, if we get into a conversation that first five minutes are crucial. I can honestly say, a good majority of the time, my initial assumptions are right (if I get to know the person enough to find out) and yes sometimes, there are those occasions where you can knock me down with a feather about exactly how wrong I was. Do I feel bad about judging people? Absolutely not. I know they’re judging me the same way. There are people who think I’m a complete asshole. Are they wrong? No – perhaps when they met me, I was having a crappy day and I was a complete asshole. That’s not all of me, that’s just what they’re unfortunate enough to know. No point in me being upset about it.
There are moments that make me cringe when I think of the impression I must have given people. I’ve been mouthy, argumentative, brash, said plenty of things without thinking – there are surely people who have formed their entire opinion of me based on those moments. But they’re not wrong for doing so. There’s not enough time in life to get to know everyone on an intimate level where you can really understand them and get to grips with what they’re about, so it’s easier to make this 5 second assumptions.
People have the right to judge you and think whatever they want about you. You just have to be comfortable enough with yourself to not particularly care either way.
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Tags: basic life facts, judging
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