Posts Tagged ‘bad boys’

Bad Boys Bad Boys Whachu Gonna Do?

Tuesday, October 27th, 2009

Every girl loves a bad boy, or so the saying goes. But what started as a fairly innocent concept has gone from a girl dating a boy from ‘the wrong side of the tracks’ to a woman marrying a man in prison. Clearly, this crap has gotten out of hand. So where do we draw the line?

When girls say they like a bad boy, by and large, they mean a guy with a ‘bit of edge’. This on the most basic level, can be broken down into the Alpha Male and the Beta Male. The Beta Male is always available to you, cries in front of you, always wants to cuddle, he’s Mr Reliable, never makes a decision, always does what you want – basically, he’s a bit of a pussy. The Alpha Male is the quintessential hunter/gatherer, he beats his chest, he’s aloof, protective, sturdy, a Man’s man, he’ll ravish you and take care of you, but he’s no push over. Most girls want this guy. The problem is that the definition of Alpha Male has now been morphed into a guy controlling his woman/women (in a mind fuck kinda way) and basically getting as much pussy as possible.

This leaves women in a strange position. Because we want that guy, but now we’re expected to accept that his inherent ‘manhood’ dictates that he must go out and spread his seed as wide as possible or push the limits of his manhood. For some men, that manifests itself in criminal activity, for others it’s multiple girlfriends, for more it’s the quest of eternal singledom and never being tied down, or ‘living the life’ as they call it.

And that’s where these men go wrong. They all make out like they want to be single for the rest of time. The way they speak about women is like we’re the devil/enemy – but yet they spend an awful lot of time chasing us. They don’t want to commit to us, yet their life is basically a prolonged exercise in the number of ways they can pursue and conquer us.

There comes a point where it’s all just a bit sad. In men’s minds, they think they can play the bachelor for the rest of time. They think they’re George Clooney. But in the real world, they’re really the old guy with the beer belly perving on girls in a night club he has no business being in. And we are not attracted to him. We pity him. Unless you have huge amounts of money, the 22-34 year olds these men seek have zero interest in them. Women are, when they reach a certain point in life, attracted to stability, commitment and trustworthiness. If you can’t bring any of those qualities to the table, what exactly is the point of you?

When you’re the guy who won’t return phone calls, who doesn’t hold down a regular job, who disappears, is evasive, elusive, lies, cheats, drinks too much – and you’re over 35? Well, it’s just sad. You’re not James Bond.

What’s worrying is that there’s a whole movement, both online and off, devoted to this ‘man culture’. Endless websites by ‘Pick Up Artists’ that teach you how to be an Aplha Male (read: a wanker) and watch women fall into your lap. Fellas, if you have to be taught, you ain’t got it. If your natural instinct is to be a nice guy, you probably shouldn’t fight it. Women over the age of 30 appreciate it. And I know you’re looking to date 19-24 year olds, but you yourself are over 30, so you should probably get to grips with reality and do it soon.

We as women need to require more too. We’ve gotten so used to this lame behaviour, we’ve come to accept it as part and parcel of the package. At a certain point, the ‘bit of edge’ we’re looking for really just boils down to, we want him to be able to fight should anyone step on our foot or such like. All that additional nonsense that goes with it is for the 19 year olds who don’t know any better.

Bad Boy Bad Boy, whatchu gonna do? Whachu gonna do when they come for you? I’m gonna walk the other way and go date a priest.

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