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Interesting post. The Internet has made it easier to express negative opinions about people due to the relative anonymity- I’m stunned at some if the excessively hateful and personal things at people often post on You Tube for example.

As I become more mature I realize that it good not to write things down in anger so at work I tend to leave a situation for a bit and then go back to it when I’m more chilled. I’ve found that I neatly always decide not to send the email or to rewrite it!

Hello, I found you via Diary of a Vintage Girl (she linked to your marvellous ‘Love is Not’ post), must have a proper snoop around, but first I just wanted to add my two pence to this discussion!

I agree, self-control comes with age, but I also think that (and forgive me for making us all sound like a bunch of old crones, I’m only 28!) I do think that the current teenage generation are so used to living their entire lives online that they seem to think that negativity is part-and-parcel of communication. They literally publish every thought that pops into their heads onto the internet, whereas people my age stil have that caution, that “who knows what Internet Perverts might be reading this?” fear. So mayeb that’s the difference?

Or, it could just be that whenever I start typing a critical comment, I catch myself, realise that I have far more pleasant things to do with my time, and skip off to the next blog?

I do agree with you on the terminology, though. There’s a big difference between petty meanness and hatred!

My mum used to tell me almost every day that people were just being mean because they were jealous. It’s weird now to think that of course they weren’t, they were just mean!!

With regards to hateful comments I just think it’s so easy to make throw away comments on the internet- I also think sometimes because it is so impersonal the people commenting forget their hateful comments are not just on a youtube video or blog post but actually aimed at a person who will be hurt by them. Maybe I’m being naiive there.

OK Mama Bangs muscles in! Yesterday I did a little interview with Esther Rantzen (listen to me name dropping!)because it’s 25 years since she launched Childline. I asked her if the problems children called about were the same today as they were 25 years ago. 25 years ago the main problem was sexual abuse. Over the years physical abuse was added to this. Today the biggest problem seems to be bullying.

Why is this? – Because with the internet people can be as mean as they like and titter behind their hands as no one can pin it on them. As you can imagine, Esther herself has been the subject of insidious bullying over the years. But, as she says, you have to develop ways of handling it. If you put yourself out there, be prepared for some nimnode to object to your very existance.

All you wise girls have realised that now. You have all been through the rage at what some jerk was throwing at you and probably with a ‘knee-jerk’(pun intended!)shot back some quick put down. Now you know better. Always remember the great Steve McCann analogy – if someone is pointing a finger at you there are still three fingers pointing back at them! They are the ones with inadequacies and hurting someone somehow makes them feel better about themselves. Really?

What we really need to do is be able to pass on our wisdom to the young kids who are being devastated by some of the messages they are getting over the internet. It should be something that is addressed head on in schools. Learn those coping techniques before the bastards can get under your skin.

Childline’s website is doing that but it needs to be taken far more seriously. If the bullies get no reaction, what are they going to do? Negativity will be beaten! Positivity will reign! and we will all love each other! Over and out.

I’m a firm believer in the fact that if I don’t have any enemies it means that there is something wrong with me, and maybe the fact that I am a bit of masochist means that I quite like have the odd adversary here or there.

No one is under any obligation to like me, but I know that the one responsibility I have is to like myself. When it really comes right down to it, what other people think of me is none of my business. But, I can keep most of my mean thoughts to myself, I wish everyone else could be a bit retro and keep it to hysterical diary entries written in red pen. The ability to be able to type something and publish it, does not mean that you should do it!