The Shoe Nazi
Our Kid told me a disturbing story the other day about shoe shopping that left me befuddled and somewhat speechless.
A family friend of ours, Ben, felt it was time he got some new footwear. He’s pretty particular about what he roams around in and is willing to spend hefty coin to get the right thing.
He went to one of the nicer areas of town where there is a congregation of higher end shoe shops. He went in and immediately felt the assistant was grilling him.
He browsed around and picked out a pair he liked. When he approached the assistant, he was greeted with an interrogation.
What would he be using the shoes for?
Umm…walking around? What did he expect the answer to be? Actually, I plan on wearing them on my hands when I do cartwheels. I also need them for rock climbing, ice hockey practice and kicking people in the shins.
How often would he be wearing them?
As often as he feels like it.
This was not the answer our not-so-friendly shoe salesman wanted to hear. Aghast, he expressed that wearing them every day simply would not do. You should not wear good shoes more than twice a week (according to the Shoe Nazi) and you should put shoe trees in after each wear. Umm, it’s really not that serious dude. Ben just wants some new scooby doos. Apparently, this lecture on shoe care went on for twenty minutes.
At the end of it, the guy flat out refused to sell him the shoes! What kind of shit is that?! Seriously, I admire his dedication to his work, but no shoe is so sacred that it can’t be worn more than twice a week. Get over yourself! And the shoe should get over itself too! What a diva. Not to mention the fact that these shoes were £260 (which I think is about $10 million in the current economy). I’m sure this guy must work on commission. You’re gonna let your misguided ethics get in the way of you earning a buck? You’re a damn egit.
In the words of Mr T – I pity the fool that refuses to sell me a shoe. Trust me, it would get ugly.
